Musings on Caitlyn Jenner

"Ladies and gentleman, the courageous, the stunning, Caitlyn Jenner." As the words rang clear out of the mouth of Abby Wambach, so many thoughts and feelings ran through me all at once. However, the most prevalent of all of these feelings wasn't happiness, surprise, or anger, but discomfort. I was scared to admit it at the time, but it was true. I was decidedly uncomfortable with a famous transgender woman winning the Arthur Ashe Award for courage. Yet, looking out into the crowd at the ESPYS I did not feel I was the only one with this awkward feeling. Many athletes at the ESPY's appeared as if they felt uneasy also. If you take a look at past Arthur Ashe Award speeches (on YouTube there's a plenty) and take a look at the crowd's reaction compared to this years, there is a profound difference in the response. Evander Holyfield said, "I just know that's Bruce Jenner and I'll leave it at that."

Uncomfortable is a word that so many of us are, well.....uncomfortable with using. We use angry, happy, sad, frustrated, motivated, disappointed, exhausted, and many others, but often times we refrain from using this word. After Caitlyn Jenner came out as being a woman who had been trapped inside a man's body all of these years there were so many differences of opinion about her situation, yet the word uncomfortable wasn't used as mush as other words. Entertainment channels were stunned at how "beautiful" and "stunning" she looked. They often would speak about her bravery and how she had to go through so much. There were contrast opinions in some more conservative news channels that would ask the question, "Is she really a hero?" "Is this really courageous and brave?" Little did we know that this contentious story would get even more dramatic, with her being given this award for courage. This clearly made many people feel awkward and anxious. Many on news channels didn't even know how to talk about it. Some anchors called Caitlyn a "he" when referring to the former Olympian, whether this was a mistake, jab, or some obstinately thinking she is still a man, who's to know for sure. The fact of the matter is this definitely ruffled the publics' feathers.

Interestingly enough, the most provocative part of this story is people criticizing the news channels usage of the word "hero" and "brave". Many have come out on social media and blasted her getting the award over other people who they feel should have deserved it like Lauren Hill. The 19 year old freshman from Mount St. Joseph University battled an inoperable brain tumor to achieve her dream of playing college basketball, while also helping to raise money for cancer research. She died in April. Another often cited is Noah Galloway, an Iraqi war veteran who lost two limbs but has continued to enter competitions, including an inspiring run on ABC's "Dancing With the Stars." So clearly people have some misgivings about giving the award to someone who was not in a war or who was not going to eventually succumb to brain cancer. I take no quarrel with the fact that many people believe these athletes, among many other athletes were deserving of the award as well, possibly being more deserving in some ways. However, to question her being labeled as a "hero" or as "courageous" I do have trouble understanding.

Is Caitlyn Jenner a hero to you? Take a second and think about that. Then ask yourself this question. Is Caitlyn Jenner a hero to others? Clearly we will get some mixed results to the first question. However, you can't argue with the fact that Jenner is a hero to others, so we will check yes to the second question. Now another question presents itself. Should she be considered a hero? ...It is not my place to stand here on my pedestal and say who is and who is not hero. That's not the point at all. The point is...it doesn't matter whether she is a hero to me or if I think she should be a hero to others. The bottom line is that, she IS a hero to thousands, maybe millions of people. Take a second and think about this for a moment. Close your eyes and imagine you have a friend, co-worker, or family member that is secretly transgender. Imagine someone specifically who you care about deeply. Then imagine if that person who is very close to you, was one of the 40% of transgender people who had attempted suicide. Is that something you would want? Of course not. Now, if that's too far fetched to some of you then let's paint a more realistic picture.

Millions of people watched Caitlyn Jenner's speech at the ESPY Awards. The chances are that thousands of the people who watched that speech were transgender. Now, statistics say that 40% of those people have attempted suicide at least once in their life. There is a good chance that watching Jenner on stage gave many of those people hope and elation towards the fact that they could be treated as equals by the public. Regardless of your feelings on Jenner and whether or not she deserved the award, if Jenner's speech saved some of these trans people's lives, was it worth it to give Jenner the award? Do they not deserve the same feelings and thoughts as other people who go through struggles? The answer to this question is clear, but frequently trans people often do not get the same thoughts and considerations as others. This type of unequal thought process has been prevalent for years against other races, ethnic groups, and genders. It is the thought process of believing we are not being prejudice or bigoted, without having any self perception of our environment.

A scene in the movie GI Jane illustrates this ignorance profoundly. In this scene, Viggo Mortensen's character and Demi Moore's character beat each other senseless for about five minutes. After the fight scene Viggo's fellow officer apologizes and says that his unequal treatment of the woman soldier (Demi's character) will never happen again and Viggo's character responds by saying, "Yea it will, maybe not with you, or these guys, or with me.....She's not the problem, we are." It's a telling scene to unequal treatment in all cases. Viggo's character is conveying two messages, one is that unfair treatment will happen again, and the other message; the people who are the object of unfair treatment aren't the problem, it's we who combat them and treat them differently that are the real problem. 

At the end of the day, giving this award to a transgender person, instead of an Iraqi veteran who lost limbs yet is still competing his heart out or a student with brain cancer who raised millions for the same cause, is going to be controversial.  It's going to make people uncomfortable, which will lead to anger and frustration. However,  acts such as these are a sign that we are evolving into a society of less judgment and more understanding for people who are different from us. Moving past our uncomfortable feelings so that other people can flourish is something our country has done before and will continue to do. There is no doubt that there is some discomfort with regards to Caitlyn Jenner winning the Arthur Ashe Award for courage, however, this discomfort doesn't change the fact that she is a hero for many trans people and that her coming forward has had a tremendous impact on millions of Americans.